worthyheir | [Video] Bat 001

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vanishingpoint

[Video] Bat 001

[An annoyed boy of 10 sits in front of his computer. He has messy black hair partially covered by a hood over his head, and is wearing a domino mask that covers his eyes. He has perfect posture, which enables the camera to catch the upper portion of his Robin costume, complete with its signature “R.”]

All right, Batman, this isn’t funny. You and I both know that the Joker is too dangerous to let live, but I knew you would be against my plan, which is why I waited for you to be away. I was trying to protect you from liability. I had no idea that you would go this far to protect him. Where did you send me? Did you enlist Zatanna to bring me here? Or perhaps Raven? Either way, I demand that you end this foolishness and bring me back right now. This is too much, even for you.

[Damian crosses his arms and his eyes narrow.]

I learned my lesson, Batman, and I demand you bring me back.

[He holds out the crowbar covered in blood to the camera.]

I'll even let you have the crowbar back. Happy?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

You did so! If we were back home I would pull up the videos of yourself you posted everywhere. A simple google search would probably turn it up. These computers have no access to the internet, however.

You claim to not be insane, but that seems to prove otherwise, doesn't it?

It was child's play for me. How my father was having issues with the gyroscopic array is beyond me.

I swear to whatever you want me to, I have not ever done anything like that. Why the hell would I post videos on the internet? Especially when Dick's girlfriend is like the internet herself? Seems pretty stupid to me.

How is testing the limits of a future ally insanity?

Because he had other things on his mind. Probably saving the world things.

Because you're insane. That's the only conclusion I can reach. ...Dick has a girlfriend?

Most people don't enjoy being blown up, regardless of whether or not they can heal.

It's clear from the blueprints he left behind that he had put some thought into it.

I'm not insane.

I got no idea what she's calling herself in your time. Oracle maybe?

Oh I know that. He stabbed me for it. But it was worth it.

He did a lot of stuff in his free time, the rare times he had free anyways.

Dick and Oracle? [Thinks about that one for a moment.]

And you say you're not insane.

...Like what?

[Snorting laughter]

Kid, back in the day Dick and Babs had the major hots for each other.

I'm not insane. I'm pleasantly hyper.

Ever wonder where all those neat gadgets you got came from? Bruce used to tinker with everything when he got a spare minute.

[More to himself]...I never would have thought... I suppose it makes sense...

Which is another way of saying "insane."

My father made all of them?

It's the spandex kid. Girl's looks hot in it. Oracle wasn't any exception.

It is not.

Yup.

Brown looks fat in spandex. Hmph, she looks fat without spandex.

...What else?

Brown? Steph Brown? Spoiler? Her costume isn't really spandex...

He did design his own batsuit.

She's fa--batgirl now.

All of them?

[Excuse him while he laughs himself stupid]

Oh that's just perfect! They're just giving the bat titles away now.

Oracle's training her. I don't see her much, which is fine by me.

How can... you know what I don't think I want to know.

I don't know nor care about their training regime.

You are still a kid.

Wait a few years. I bet you'll be sneaking down to see if Oracle has any of her Birds over.

Ew! They're all old.

Old?

[Bursts out laughing. Oh Damian you're just a kid!]

Kid most of the Birds are in better shape than most teenagers. Age don't mean anything.

Old is old, no matter how attractive they may look on the outside. I've been around far too many Lazarus pits, Todd.

I'm surprised you weren't born into one. But that doesn't matter. I've been around them too. Probably why the age thing doesn't bother me.

Also, I was dead for a few years. So my age is off anyways.

I was born in a test tube.

You died? Like grandfather... Whose body did you steal to come back?

I know that. I was being... you know what never mind.

No. The Joker killed me.. how did you become Robin and didn't know that? It's like the horror story that follows the Robin mantle around.

I didn't steal anyone's body. I remember being in Heaven... then waking up in my coffin. I dug myself out of my own grave. Then your mother tossed me in a Lazarus pit. How I got from point A to point B however is a mystery.

I knew that...! That's why I was using the crowbar on the Joker... [He keeps forgetting that the Robin named Jason Todd is also the psycho named Jason Todd since the other two Robin's he's around are freaking boy scouts.]

Yes, I heard grandfather wasn't happy about that.

[Snickers. Because that's still amusing.] And I'm going to love hearing that, every single time.

Ah, no. Your grandfather basically hates me.

I only wish I had been able to finish the job before I wound up here.

I don't think he likes anyone other than himself.

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